Many homeschool families start their homeschooling journeys in a very relaxed manner. Then, when high school hits, they toughen up and get down to the “serious” business of learning – complete with AP classes and math tutors and ACT prep courses on the side.

Not my family. We were quite the opposite.

We started our homeschool journey from Kindergarten with a fairly rigid, overly-academic, highly structured routine with tough curricula, tests every Friday, and tons of material to “master” through memorization. Guess what? My kids were burned out by the time they got to high school.

It took a LOT of effort on my part to let go and trust that my children could learn without all the pressure of a standard college-prep education.

Now we have a relaxed homeschool high school that focuses on the fundamentals and with plenty of time for delight directed learning.

So, what does our relaxed homeschool high school look like?

What does a relaxed homeschool high school look like? Delight directed learning for teens. over a picture of a teen girl sitting on the ground

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Less Focus on Memorization, More Focus on Exposure

So much of standardized education today is focused on memorization and regurgitation. Late-night cram sessions are the norm for many high school students. They learn how to quickly memorize the material and retain it only long enough to spit it out on a test. As such, many students are not really mastering the material as much as they are mastering the use of their short term memory. Very little actually “sticks” for a lifetime.

This might sound radical, but, honestly, I just don’t care anymore if my kids can quote the steps of mitosis in order or the dates that Napoleon ruled France. BUT, I do want them to know that mitosis is the process by which cells replicate and the implication that has on biological development. I want them to know that Napoleon was the product of a new anti-monarchy, pro republic philosophy that had far-reaching consequences.

In other words, I care more that my teens grasp the concepts and general ideas. If they happen to remember the term “telophase”, then great. If not, so be it.

Less Focus on Content Subjects, More Focus on Fundamentals

Though I don’t ask my kids to memorize every little fact, I still hyper-focus on the fundamentals in high school: Reading, Writing, and Arithmetic.

I’m shocked by the growing number of teens who graduate high school, get accepted to good colleges and universities, and STILL have to take remedial courses in English and Math.

Simplifying and relaxing our homeschool structure means reading lots of material and rewriting it in your own words. Or looking at a work of fine art and creating a story around it… always practicing sentence formation, organizational structure, and grammar. Math is often reviewing the basics of finding the lowest common denominators or simplifying fractions.

Less Structured Curriculum, More Alternative Media

One day when my son was around 14-years-old, I found him in his room playing video games. Not unusual. But what I saw that day fascinated me and propelled me to change the way we homeschool.

I found him sitting at his desk staring at the TV screen with his fingers rapidly working all the buttons on the controller. But, he had the sound on the TV turned all the way down. Instead, on his computer, he was streaming a TED talk about theoretical physics. It was the TED talk that had his attention. The video game was merely keeping his eyes and hands busy while he listened.

From that day forward, I began to incorporate more videos into his lessons. YouTube videos or movies on NetFlix were much more likely to hold his attention and actually teach him something, than reading a chapter in a textbook and answering questions about the reading.

Less Worksheets, More Open-Ended Notebooking Pages

So, if I was going to let my child learn by watching movies, documentaries, and YouTube videos, how was I going to grade him? How was I going to know he was actually learning and retaining anything? What about a homeschool portfolio?

This is when notebooking pages entered my home and changed our homeschool forever. I bought a lifetime membership to productivehomeschooling.com (formally known as notebookingpages.com). Yes, this is kind of a shameless plug, I admit. But I only harp on the greatness of Productive Homeschooling because it truly provided the structure we needed to move forward with relaxed homeschooling.

Productive Homeschooling offers literally thousands of open-ended notebooking pages so my kids can record what they learn, write biographies, create their own project books, and more. Unlike regular notebook paper in a spiral folder, the pages that I can print from Productive Homeschooling are inspirational. There is often a place to attach a picture, or two, or three. My kids can take that as a lead to write about three different areas of whatever topic they are studying.

I have come to appreciate that my teens are not being told exactly what to study, but have instead taken ownership of their own educations. Instead of being told by a worksheet what questions they need to be able to answer, the notebooking pages let them pull out information that excites them and lets them expand on that information using their own creativity.

Free Homeschool Resources (Notebooking Pages & More!)

Less Tests, More Projects

If my teens are choosing what to focus on, then how do I test them to see if they actually understand the material?

I could review their notebooking pages and pull some tidbits out to use on a test, but then we are just back to memorizing and regurgitating. We have already decided that is not where we want to be.

Instead, it is up to my kids to put together a project that demonstrates what they have learned. These projects can take the form of a research paper. Sometimes it’s a PowerPoint presentation. Other times it’s a collection of timelines, biographies, and fact sheets.

If they can teach me or explain to me what they have learned, then I know that they “get” the material and have learned it thoroughly.

No tests needed.

Less College Acceptance Hoop-Jumping and More Learning How to Live in the Real World

A lot of the structure and requirements in brick and mortar high schools today are based on what colleges and universities want to see from their applicants tomorrow.

Here’s a secret few people know: there are actually other ways to get into college. Shocking, I know.

Your teen does not actually need to graduate from an accredited high school to be accepted into college. Is acceptance to college more difficult for the relaxed homeschooled high schooler? Somewhat, yes, but not impossible. Most colleges and universities will want to see a strong SAT or ACT score and they may require a relaxed homeschooler to show SAT II subject test scores to prove knowledge.

My opinion is that 6 months or so of intense study for these tests is better than asking my kids to sacrifice their childhood and teen years maneuvering through the gauntlet that is traditional schooling.

What we focus on instead: life skills, personal development, and living in community with others. My teens use most of their time pursuing their own interests. They contribute to the running of our household more so than many teens, simply because they have more time than most teens. They have plenty of time to get out into the community to work jobs, volunteer, play sports, do community theater, and so much more.

Something to think about: many people argue that homeschoolers are sheltered from the real world when, in reality, public schoolers are being sheltered from the real world. You don’t need to institutionalize kids to teach them how to act in the “real world”. You can just actually take your kids into the real world and do some on-the-job training.

Realizing That Less Is More

C.S. Lewis once said, “The greatest service we can do to education today is to teach fewer subjects. No one has time to do more than a few things well before he is 20, and when we force a boy to be a mediocrity in a dozen subjects we destroy his standards, perhaps for life.”

This has become my educational theory. What subjects are the MOST important? Reading, writing, and arithmetic. With these three disciplines down, you can go anywhere. The rest should be what interests the individual. For my own teens that has been theoretical physics, theater, the Renaissance, Korea, Hitler’s Germany, the Wild West, video production, music writing, film studies, Humanities, Philosophy and Religion, music and art history, Black history, art, history of video games, the future of technology, and so much more.

By focusing on only mastering the big three (reading, writing, and arithmetic), our relaxed homeschool allows my teens to apply that knowledge to their own interests.

And they ARE learning.

A lot!

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