There are many stay at home mom pros and cons. There are also a lot of working mom pros and cons, as well. Making the decision that is right for your family can be daunting.
Since I have never been an outside-the-house working mother, I won’t even attempt to approach that angle. What I do have is 21-years of experience as a stay-at-home mom, so I can offer my perspective on the good, the bad, and the ugly.
Stay at Home Mom Pros
- Never, or rarely ever, missing your child’s firsts: first steps, first words, first experiences, etc.
- Being your child’s first teacher. This is an awesome responsibility, but one that will have a lasting impact on your children. They will be learning how to act and react based on your example.
- Providing your child with much needed one-on-one time. Talking to them, or letting them talk to you about anything and everything can teach them that their thoughts and opinions matter. Bonus: You, as mom, will get to know your children better.
- Plenty of time to make memories together. My own adult children still recount their favorite memories from childhood with many being something silly that happened on a random Tuesday during the day. Since I was with them, these are shared memories that bond us even more.
- Being there when they get home from school. Because I was a latchkey kid, I came home to an empty house. By the time my parents got home and asked me about my day, I had already forgotten.
- Easier transition to homeschooling if that’s the path you need to take. No need for one parent to quit their job, since one parent is already at home.
- More flexibility in your schedule. Want to meet dad for lunch? Easy. Need to take a family mental health day and just snuggle on the sofa watching movies? Done.
- Saving money. This may sound counter-intuitive, but having one parent stay home can actually improve your finances. No daycare costs, potentially less gas/commuting costs, more (cheaper) home-cooked meals, no professional wardrobe needed, lower tax bracket… the savings can add up.
- Potential for making money from home. My mom had no choice but to put me in daycare at 6-weeks old, so she could go back to work and make money. We live in the digital age now, so we can be stay at home moms and still make a little (or a lot) of money from home.
Stay at Home Mom Cons
- Loneliness. This was hands down my biggest issue as a stay at home mom. Check out 5 Tips for the Lonely Stay at Home Mom to see how I dealt with (and beat) my loneliness.
- 24/7/365 job. Being a stay at home mom means never getting a break. No 30-minute lunch breaks to sit and catch your breath. No commute to use for listening to music or podcasts or books. No getting time alone to focus on one task at a time.
- Multitasking, whether you like it or not. I HATE multitasking (the entire point of this blog!), but you have no choice but to multitask as a stay at home mom. Just when you start vacumming, a child will need you to wipe their nose (or other body part!). You’ll master holding a child on your hip while stirring a pot on the stove. And you can forget about making phone calls without interruption!
- Loss of income. Though staying home can save your family money, in some circumstances it can cost you. If you are a lawyer with a 6-figure income, quitting to stay home would probably hurt your family finances.
Final Thoughts
As you probably figured out while reading, there are many ways to overcome and adapt all of the above pros and cons whether you are a stay at home mom or a working mother. For example, stay at home moms CAN find time alone… you just have to make it a priority and have some help. Working moms can still build strong bonds with their children by making the most of the time they do have with their kids (quality over quantity).
At the end of the day, only you and your family knows what’s best for your family’s situation. Both stay at home moms and working moms are going to face joys and struggles (pros and cons). Set your priorities, consider the sacrifices, and do what you have to do for you and your family.
Peace and love to you, Mama.
